Offensive: adjective: 1. Causing anger, resentment, or moral outrage. 2. Causing physical repugnance.

(Repugnance: a very strong dislike or distaste.)


SO, this rant was scheduled to be – “Michael Bay: You Suck” but due to a recent Status Message war on my facebook wall, I’m going off on a DIFFERENT rant for your reading pleasure… and open debate/bitch-session allowed below.

Warning to sensitive readers: This may piss you off. Proceed with caution.

( cut for size! )

Well, as soon a I can get "awake" here, I'll be making for the border and then for home. 3.5 days of driving... awesome. (no)

My time here in Canada was nice. But I am ready to be home with my lovely fiancée.

Hope you all had a great 4th of July and nobody took a firework to the eye! (happened to my cousin when we were kids... not pleasant)

Anyway, that is all!

-Ben


PS. I just had the strangest dream, in which I Was arguing with Kara Thrace (aka Starbuck) from BSG. It was odd.

Current Location: Saskatoon, SK

So, yesterday I decided to head to the store to buy some provisions. Because, let’s face it, $10 for a coke in the hotel is a bit much…. Anyway, I made my way to the doorman and asked for directions. In a very odd move, the only stores he could suggest were at other hotels! WTF eh? Anyway, I headed out and walked along the river. It was a nice afternoon, the sun was shining, some drunk kid was pissing on a statue in the park… all the good things of a summer holiday.

Well, I finally found my store and entered… behind the counter sat a woman in her early twenties or late teens sitting behind what appeared to be a 20” laptop. Immediately my eyes were drawn to two things.

1: She had an enormous rack (Well into the “D” range). But on top of that, it was a poorly covered rack. I believe some super-adhesive double-sided tape was keenly placed at two points to keep her street-legal. I mean, the shirt itself was unbuttoned to below her cleavage… I double-checked to make sure I had gone in the right door…

2: She had 9 lbs of eyeliner on EACH eye. I don’t mean it was just dark… I mean it incased her eyes in a circle of darkness reserved for people lacking sleep for 3 weeks and zombies... and, of course, raccoons.

My mind was in a veritable meltdown of things at which to stare. I couldn’t help but think I had found Ranger Rick’s long lost cousin: “Slutty The Raccoon.” Well, I went about my business in an awkward level of uneasiness and proceeded to the counter.

Looking up from the laptop, the whites of her eyes almost frightened me. And I said “And I need a pack of cigarettes.”

- and this is where Slutty The Raccoon proceeded to show me her lack of a brain. The conversation went as follows roughly… And keep in mind, as she spoke her head actually shifted back and forth on her shoulders like a bobble-head.

Me: “Camel Lights, please.”
Slutty: (not looking as she reaches for them.)
Me: “Not that one. Nope. Nope. Yes. That one.”
Slutty: “Looks like you got the last pack!”
Me: “I guess I’m special then.”
Slutty: “HAHAHA” (I’m not sure why she was laughing)
Me: “Uh…..? I don’t mean short-bus special.”
Slutty: “HAHA… I had an ex who used to call me ‘Short Bus’ I always thought it was a cute little nickname until I found out he was calling me a fucking retard.”
Me: “Wow.”
Slutty: “I know, right? I don’t know why I stayed with him. He was such an asshole.”
Me: “Well, you have a good day.”

And then I left the store laughing. Again checking for a sing that this was, in fact, a store and not some sort of secret semi-topless weirdo-shop.

Oh well. On my return trip, I ate my coffee crisp and took in the sights of a man’s dog trying to hump a tree, a three-hundred pound woman falling Uphill, and two, VERY white looking kids dressed to the 9s in gangster clothes pumping some hard core Rap out of their little car.

Sometimes, my little vacations are full of interesting little tidbits.

That’s all for now! Time to go see what today will bring!

Current Location: Saskatoon, SK
Current Mood: amused
Current Music: Jazz

What up people? Sorry, I've been absent. My spare time as of late has been devoted to writing my short stories again. For some reason, spending countless hours alone in a truck makes my mind run rampant.

So, Today I am in Brandon, MB in Canada, about to head off to Saskatoon, SK... And it's Canada Day!

As such, I would like to submit the following rant...

Ode to Canadians. Eh?
(please read the following in a Canada accent. It makes it better)
Being my fourth trip to Canada or so, I must say, you fuckers are alright, eh! I have yet to meet a Canadian that I don't like. From the moment I leave the US and enter this vast, open country, I am greeted with happy little accents and people are just so damned friendly it almost hurts at first. But, in a good way. And it is true... 90% of the people I have met here use the "word" "EH" as an attachment to almost every sentence uttered and it is awesome. On top of that, they have Coffee Crisps and Mr. Big bars... And that ALONE is enough to make me want to apply for citizenship.

You see, when I do a job at home, the locals are all bitter from doing this job too long. But you Canadians have told me every good place to eat, offered to take me drinking in your backyard around a fire, given me free internet at the venue and food. TONS of food. It's like I am some long lost cousin and it is your job to make sure I am fed. You rock!

AND... as if this wasn't enough. You are kind enough to NOT censor movies on tv. Boobs and swear words on a station OTHER than HBO or Showtime!? Are you people crazy! Crazy-Awesome! THEN, it gets better, you use the METRIC SYSTEM! Thank you. You know how much easier it is to divide things by TEN and not random numbers like, oh, I don't know... twelve? 10=easy, 12=suck.

If some other country decides it doesn't like you guys, I will come here and offer my services in the fight, eh! Then we can all watch Hockey, drink some Tim Horton's and eat a Coffee Crisp!

But, alas, I must finish this rant and shower and make my way to Saskatoon. Nothing says Happy Canada Day like a 5 hour drive!

So,

Tags: canada day, canada rocks
Current Location: Brandon, MB
Current Music: Oh, Canda

SQUIRRELS!!!!!!!


So… today at Grant Park, I witnessed, what would be later described by the Nature Channel and a snuff film in the making, a horrific event. Only I had no camera and the incident was only seen by my naked eye. My naked, horrified eye…

So, I was standing there in the rain as I had been doing for the previous 2 hours. My shirt and skin were soaked through and my body was weak with fatigue. It was in this weakened state that my eyes were drawn to a sudden and violent movement in the distance… It will haunt me in the years to come.

I saw 2 squirrels… one was smaller than the other and clearly the one being violated. The larger, aggressive squirrel kept chasing her and forcing himself on her. Up the tree, down the tree, through the water… it didn’t matter. I kept waiting for him to smack her and call her Whitney. While the people around me talked about the day’s work ahead of us I was drawn to this horrific scene of nature… this unholy violation of a young squirrel in her prime being tackled repeatedly and forced to submit against her will… I felt dirty. I felt like I couldn’t wash the pain away regardless of the rain!

When it ended, I cried a little. The smaller squirrel climbed a tree and ran home to wash away the sin while the larger one stood there, bragging to his squirrel friends and going on with his nut gathering… asshole squirrel.

Anyway… I now go to attempt my sleep. But I feel the actions I witnessed today will not allow me a peaceful rest. Marty Stouffer and Wild America tell you that nature is beautiful and wonderful… they don’t tell you about the violent, Bobby Brown squirrels out there. They don’t tell you that nature is evil and violent and can turn a normal job into a backroom snuff show.

They just don’t tell you about the HORROR! THE HORROR!!!!!!!!


The end.

So, I got a scratch on my hand the other day at work and it just wouldn't get better... this morning, I found a small sliver of metal in it... how crazy is that?

SO... today I left work to come home and cash a check before the banks close... nothing too exciting. But when I enter the local Chase Bank the usual air of "hurry the fuck up, we're almost closed" was not there... instead, a small huddle of people surrounded what appeared to be some trapped and feral animal in the corner. In any event... it was something in pain.

Well, in being the busy-body that I am in these events, I of course walk over and use the tried and true "Excuse me, I have some medical training from the Army" (SOME... I didn't say a lot. I just wanted to see what was up)... Well, they sure trust a man in a past-tense uniform. BEHOLD THE ANIMAL!!! ....Turns out, it was not a wild animal, but a child. A small boy who had been playing with the clasps on the end of the "magic lane ropes" of the bank line... Well, I'm not sure how A led to B... but all I know is that there was a significant amount of blood on the floor and the child was screaming like he'd been given a swift beating by an ex-con.

The child extended his hand and removed the wad of paper-towels... And I draw back in abhorrent fear of the mangled piece of flesh that was once this boy's fingertip and quickly think [HOLY SHIT!] - but my mouth simply stated "Yeah, you're going to need to get him to the ER..." ['cause, well... I'm not fucking touching that shit.]

From here, our problem descends into madness when the feral boy is being scolded by his loving mother to STFU because she is afraid... the mom and the boy do not speak the best English. And my Hindi is not what it once was... well, Actually it IS what it once was, which is nothing. SO... We (me and the bank teller) draw them a map to St. Francis ER... but I think they would rather not go. So, she instead waits for her sister to arrive... and make a deposit... before they leave the bank. A family that banks together... bleeds together?

I then proceed to get my check cashed and turn to leave... noticing the bright, bold red droplets adorning the white, tile floor of the bank. "Y'all may want to invest in some bleach."

The end.

How much do I hate the movie "Twilight"? -- and I use the term "movie" lightly.

The short answer is: a lot.

The long answer is: a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

First off... it's a crappy movie. Not just in the aspect of plot, etc... but I mean, it's just been made in a really awful way. I know college freshmen who could do a better job at makeup and special effects. I mean, come on... you're a big Hollywood movie! Next... the acting? COME ON! I've seen better acting at the Kindergarten graduation extravaganza. These people suck. All the way across the board... But why do I hate it so much? Other than the afore-mentioned suck-factor? Hows about, I spent $4.00 on it and felt like they should pay ME after I had watched it. I can't believe they're even thinking about making a second... or, for the fear of killing myself, a third? AHHHHHHH!!! Why would you do this?!

I mean... correct me if I'm wrong... but what makes this a "good" story is the supposed love between the two main actors? I've seen divorced couples who hate each other that have more chemistry than these two.

Lets not forget the sparkly, kid-friendly, vampire revelation that allows our illustrious, bad-acting, lead to walk in the sunlight! Do you even understand the idea of Vampires? Do you?

Then there is Bella... what a shitty role-model. "I'm in a new place. I don't fit in. I fall a lot and I just want to let Edward have his way with me at the age of 16, even though every other boy in this film wants to do me." -- Seriously... the lady who wrote this drivel needs to have her writing license revoked... in a big way.

If I want fanfic, I can write my own. I want a professionally written story and movie... not this tripe... And I still want my $4.00 back.

See... I'm a vampire guy. I like Vampire movies... and this... this is not a vampire movie. This is crap. This is more than crap actually... Given $200 and a camera, I bet me and my friend, Dan, could come up with a better vampire movie than this.

This is the cinematic version of the Jonas Brothers.

If you want a good vampire movie, might I suggest the following as a better way to spend your time and money.

Blade
Underworld
Night Watch/Day Watch
The Lost Boys
The Monster Squad
Interview With a Vampire
My Best Friend Is a Vampire
Buffy The Vampire Slayer

So, here is another rant.

This day is a great day. I mean... thanks to all the men and women who have given their lives in defense of this nation, I can go to any department store, clothing store, furniture, electronic, etc.... And get 50% off of damn near anything! Wow. Who knew that a good sale only required the deaths of so many US men and women?

Today, while driving, a sign caught my eye. Large, blue and red letters proclaimed "HONOR OUR VETERANS" ... the next line was "SALE LASTS UNTIL TUESDAY!" -- I mean really? Fuck you.

And... while I do appreciate, in all seriousness, the "thank yous" and whatnot... I am not dead. Veterans Day is in November. I'll be more than happy to hear those sentiments then. Right now, honor and remember the men and women who have fallen. Remember the people who stood up for this great nation.

This holiday goes back to the Civil War, if I'm not mistaken... brother fighting brother and dying to maintain this Union. Honor them. Honor the Men and women who who froze in their trenches to fight Fascism and Nazis. Honor the men who were so greatly dishonored by their country for fighting in Vietnam. Honor the men and women of this current war who have given their life...

We have so many holidays to honor and celebrate the living. But this day should be about the ones who are not living. The ones who no longer have a voice. This day is for them... and not some buy one get one sale at the shoe store, or half-off plasma tvs... fuck that.

So, there is my rant. Today, I honor those men and women in my own way. And I hope you do too.

-Benjamin



To put things in perspective:
Here is a listing of major wars of the United States. American Revolution (1775–1783) Total servicemembers 217,000 Battle deaths 4,435 Non mortal woundings 6,188 War of 1812 (1812–1815) Total servicemembers 286,730 Battle deaths 2,260 Nonmortal woundings 4,505 Indian Wars (approx. 1817–1898) Total servicemembers 106,0001 Battle deaths 1,0001 Mexican War (1846–1848) Total servicemembers 78,718 Battle deaths 1,733 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 11,550 Nonmortal woundings 4,152 Civil War (1861–1865) Total servicemembers (Union) 2,213,363 Battle deaths (Union) 140,414 Other deaths in service (nontheater) (Union) 224,097 Nonmortal woundings (Union) 281,881 Total servicemembers (Conf.) 1,050,000 Battle deaths (Conf.) 74,524 Other deaths in service (nontheater) (Conf.) 59,297 Nonmortal woundings (Conf.) unknown Spanish-American War (1898–1902) Total servicemembers 306,760 Battle deaths 385 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 2,061 Nonmortal woundings 1,662 World War I (1917–1918) Total servicemembers 4,734,991 Battle deaths 53,402 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 63,114 Nonmortal woundings 204,002 Living veterans fewer than 500 World War II (1940–1945) Total servicemembers 16,112,566 Battle deaths 291,557 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 113,842 Nonmortal woundings 671,846 Living veterans 4,762,000 Korean War (1950–1953) Total servicemembers 5,720,000 Serving in-theater 1,789,000 Battle deaths 33,741 Other deaths in service (theater) 2,827 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 17,730 Nonmortal woundings 103,284 Living veterans 3,734,000 Vietnam War (1964–1975) Total servicemembers 8,744,000 Serving in-theater 3,403,000 Battle deaths 47,410 Other deaths in service (theater) 10,789 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 32,000 Nonmortal woundings 153,303 Living veterans 8,295,000 Gulf War (1990–1991) Total servicemembers 2,225,000 Serving in-theater 665,476 Battle deaths 147 Other deaths in service (theater) 382 Other deaths in service (nontheater) 1,565 Nonmortal woundings 467 Living veterans 1,852,000 Operation Enduring Freedom (October, 2001- present) (Afghanistan/Pakistan) Battle Deaths--373 Wounded--1,096 Operation Iraqi Freedom (March 2003 - present) Total Deaths--3,391 KIA--2,761 Wounded--23,924 US civilian deaths-contractors--147 Non-hostile deaths--585

Hello world. My name is Ben. And I am an Atheist. Let me clarify this:

I am not secretly a Christian. I am not Agnostic. I do not just hate Christians. I do not just hate Muslims. I do not just hate Jews. I do not just hate Gays, Lesbians, or Transgenders. I don't hate anyone really... (see comments below)

Belief be·lief n
1. acceptance by the mind that something is true or real
2. confidence that somebody or something is good or will be effective
3. a statement, principle, or doctrine that a person or group accepts as true
4. an opinion, especially a firm and considered one


I do not believe in a supreme being who magically created the world on a whim and then told his creation to act in the complete opposite way in which they were made.


Here is what I believe:

I believe in science. I believe that all things that exist can be explained rationally through the use of intelligence and reason.

I believe in morality. I believe that people, in order to exist on this planet, need to have a set of rules and live accordingly.

I believe Jesus was a real man... in the same way I believe Gandhi was real, MLK Jr and Mohamed were all real. And I believe they all had really good ideas about getting along and chilling the fuck out. I do not, however, believe any of them were sent from, fathered by, or made by a god.

I believe that some people need the idea of religion and a god to function. My parents, and many of my friends are religious and I think that going to church is good for them because they do not like the idea of death being the end of it all.

I believe that everything that supposedly happened in the bible (ie the plagues of Egypt, etc.) can be explained with reason and rational thought.

I believe that prayer and meditation are simply ways to alter one's own biochemical makeup of the brain, thus allowing for clarity or relaxation... a lot like exercising does for some people.

I believe that most organized religions are nothing more than a way to control the thoughts and actions of people in order to gain money, power and control in the world.

I believe that when I am told "I'll pray for you." That people really don't understand that I don't want that in any way, shape or form. You might as well sacrifice an animal or two... the result is the same: You've wasted your time and insulted my beliefs.

I believe that if you know I'm an atheist and continue to ask me to come to church or tell me that you don't believe me, I have every right to point out all the things I find wrong with your church and religion as a whole. And I believe that if you don't like it, you can turn the other cheek.

I believe that people who claim to be "very religious" and then tell me how much they hate illegal immigrants and want them all deported have clearly not read their own book of faith.

I believe that anyone who supports "war" should resign from the idea of Christianity/Islam/Judaism etc because if religion can incite a war... why can't it work for peace?

I believe that Christmas and Easter can be celebrated by Atheists because a: There isn't a whole lot of religion left in either holiday and b: I get to spend quality time with my family and that is always a good thing.

I believe that religion and the idea of god should not be allowed anywhere near schools, colleges, the government or news networks. Religion is a private matter and should be taught by churches and parents at HOME.

I believe that religions are more exclusive than inclusive... which completely goes against the idea of 90% of all the religions that exist currently on this planet. If people actually read the Bible, Torah, Koran, etc... they would see that their gods are loving and caring to all walks of life. And not only those who are believers.

I believe that when I die, my body will return to the pieces of the earth from which it was made and I will cease to exist on this planet in this form.

I believe that life is too short to hate anyone for being different than me. We're ALL different and that's what makes life good. (On a side note, however, I do hate Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly for their continued preaching of hate and ignorance to the masses who openly follow them... it does nothing but spread intolerance. And I do get the humor in being intolerant of intolerant people)

I believe that people are people and we all make mistakes. And I am willing to accept people for their mistakes.

I believe that the human brain is one of the most complex biochemical "computers" in the entire universe and I am glad to have one.

I believe that love exists between people and marriage exists when two people agree to be together forever. I don't need a man in a robe to tell me that I'm married.

I believe in a lot of things... but I do not believe what you believe. I'll respect your choice if you respect mine.

I believe that if you're still reading this, then you deserve a cookie. But seeing as how I'm not there to give it to you... you'll have to fend for yourself.


-Benjamin

This is made of win...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!!!!!

So... what has 2 thumbs and a bad habbit of forgetting his shoes in various hotels?!

d- This guy -b

So... I once left my tennis shoes in a hotel in Pennsylvania... THEN I left my dress shoes on a cruise ship... THEN, I left my NEW black shoes in CT.

So... yeah. I'm just friggin awesome like that.

SO... I'm sittin here... with drink in hand. Watching 9 different news networks... waiting for Obama to win!

I've got a big, blue foam finger with an "O" on it... every time I hear "Maverick" I take a shot... and every time Obama wins a state I shout out the window "TAKE THAT REDNECKS!!!!"

... then I'd get shot by a neighbor. I'm in a pretty unfriendly area when it comes to being an Obama supporter.

I love election night for some reason. The previous 2 elections I stayed up until like 3am watching the news come in... And... I have a confession to make... this is the first time I've ever voted for a Presidential candidate. Yep. 1st time EVER.

8 years ago, I was 22... There was no war... I didn't give a fuck. I was registered at home and went there to vote for my mom... And that's all.

4 years ago, I was freshly home from Iraq. I was very confused and usually pretty drunk. When the election rolled around, I hated Bush... but I didn't really like Kerry... and neither was a good choice in my opinion. So I just didn't vote for them. I, instead, voted for Michael for county council... and that's all.

13 hours ago, I was determined, happy and anxious. I made my way into the booth, voted for Obama... And then proceeded to vote for all the offices on the Ballot... it was awesome.

What has changed? I grew up. I learned things. I decided that if I ever want to bitch about anything or whatnot... I have to take part in the voting process (fucked up as it may be). And from now on... I'll be at every election in my future... I mean, I'm getting married and hoping to have a family. So, I need to help shape the future for myself... and my family.

Anywho... I'm going back to the tv now.

I hope you are well out there, world.

-Benjamin

So, today is Election day!! And I'm excited. Regardless of who wins today, I, we, will be getting a new President!!

I am leaving in a few minutes to go cast my vote down the street before I head off to work! And I urge all of you out there to go VOTE!!!

For your reading enjoyment, I present to you "A Rant, by Benjamin Hussein Bass"


SO... as some of you might have noticed I recently added my "middle" name to Facebook. Now... let's take a look at this decision.

Hussein is not a bad name. It's just a name. A very good man I knew (While in Iraq) was named Hussein and he was a good friend to me...

But wait? How can that be?? The former ruler of Iraq was named Saddam Hussein! And he's an asshole!

Well, 'my friends,' A name is a name and, for the most part, people don't pick their own names... which leads me to my next point: Barack Hussein Obama.

NO!!! Not HIM! He's an evil Muslim terrorist hellbent on destroying America! -- And if you believe that... you need to delete me as your friend, because you are a fucking retard and I have no tolerance for your ignorance.

He's from non-Anglo ancestry on his father's side, thus the "conservatives" hate him already (even though the Bible teaches them not to judge... unless you're a dirty Muslim right?). Top that with a name that is close to two of this country's greatest enemies in recent times... (Obama rhymes with Osama... so he must be evil right?) and the Christian "God Bless America" base is going to have their heads explode unanimously.

So, here is my question... why?

Why does it matter? Why does it matter if his name is SIMILAR to anything? Why does it matter if he is a Muslim? (Point of fact: this is NOT a Christian nation. The founding fathers were Deist... not Christian.) Why can't people get over the fear of something new? Something different?

Now, with those questions in mind... apply the word "why?" to the rest of the world. I would like to think that mankind is intelligent enough to look for the answers on any question as opposed to blindly following ANYTHING... but then it occurs to me that: A Person is smart... people, en mass, are scared, hateful sheep who think and vote with their fears and not their hopes... And that bother me greatly...

Then there is my next point: The Bill Ayers argument. Before anyone says anything about adding to the "Terrorist" idea I'll say this: I've known people in my life who have done some shitty things. I know people who, given the right catalyst, would most likely turn to social dissidence. And I hope that I wouldn't be judged (ooo... there's that magic "judgement" word again) by their actions. But, in the case of Obama/Ayers... William Ayers did some horrible things in his past... but has, since then, turned his life to education and the betterment of the youth of America. He was asked to partake in the Annenberg Challenge Project Board of Directors (Annenberg, by the way, supports McCain... does he get the terrorist tie? No...) to oversee the distribution of grants in Chicago. Later in 1995, Ayers hosted "a coffee" for "Mr. Obama's first run for office." -- OH NOES! He's EVIL!!!

Fuck that. Get over yourself people... or are you too tired to turn the other cheek?

Now.. I will draw this rant to an end... I am a veteran of the United States Army who served in Iraq. And I am voting for Barack Hussein Obama for President of the United States.

I don't care who people vote for. It is your Constitutional right and I support you to vote for whomever you want. But do it with thinking about what is best for the country and not because Rush douchebag Limbaugh told you to.

/rant

Tags: ayers, barack, bill ayers, election, hussein, obama

So... for those of you not on Deviantart...

I took some photos tonight at sunset at the abandoned "Fairland Recreational Park" -- when I was a kid, it was the shit. But it then became polluted and ruined... BUT... it still makes for a pretty sunset.


My attempt at HDR





No real editing on the rest...

Another reason why my dad is the coolest dad ever....


( Cut to preserve the awesomeness of it all )

Well... I'm 29 now.

yaaay...
bleh...

I have some new photos up on photoben...